Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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