Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
