I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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