aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
