Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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