U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize