So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Randomize
