My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
