I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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