If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize