I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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