Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
