Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
