She's JV to your varsity
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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