She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
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