she was so not down for the gang bang
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
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Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
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how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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