I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
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