My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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