It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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