She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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