you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Randomize
