He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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