Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
