Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Watching her eat just hurts me
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
