you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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