I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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