also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
