I can't watch pbs sober anymore
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
