corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.