and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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