well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I think my moral compass just broke
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
