Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
well most of my day revolves around power hour
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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