i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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