Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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