she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
