i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
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