But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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