Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Floor bacon is actually really good
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
