just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
