Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I need to calm my uterus...
My bed smells like the plague
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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