hell yes lets make some ravioli
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize