She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting married
To pizza
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize