love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
