we have pet lesbian snakes
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
