we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
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