Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Randomize
