i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Randomize
