I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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