dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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