My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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