If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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