Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
